We've received a copy of this Hurt Feelings Report, part of which can be seen below:
Pat Lynch, who led Buffalo to two state football championships, has resigned as the team’s head coach after handing out an offensive survey to his players.
“I would like to apologize for my lapse in judgment and the poor choice that I made from my position as the Head Football Coach for Buffalo High School,” the statement said. “I know that this situation has caused you pain and discomfort, and for that I am truly sorry. As a person and a professional, I believe I will learn and grow from this experience and use it to help others.
Now we here at People Liking People are all for treating kids like shit and acting like their feelings don't matter but Pat Lynch seems to be a bit too focused on the sexual orientation of his players. Yeah we get it, you gotta be a tough strong man or else you're a wimpy fag...sure. It's just that the people who have this type of mentality the most are the ones dealing with their own homosexual tendencies. And do you think it's a coincidence that his job for the past 22 years just so happens to involve being in the locker room with a bunch of hot sweaty guys day in and day out? Sure Mr Lynch, the high school guys just wanting to play a game of football are the queer ones, not you.
And how did Pat Lynch react when this came to light and before the school board? He said "Deal with it bitches" right? No, he apologized like a little bitch.
The strange thing about this whole story is that while he was forced to step down as head coach, he is allowed to continue his job as a guidance counselor at the school. Isn't that even worse than having him as a football coach? I mean you kind of expect coaches to be assholes, it sort of goes with the territory. But for a guidance counselor position you're going to want a higher standard of professionalism.
"You want to sign up for orchestra and art class?? What are you some kind of pussy??"